Where do my true talents lie?  How come the net doesnt have an answer for a Ruy Lopez opening where white castle’s on the 5th move.  How about Max Mosley’s recent orgy leak in the News of The World? Why does my girlfriend antagonise me at the weekends even though she has not seen me all week?  Whay can’t she understand that I like time to myself on occassion even it means an hour or two in front of the chess board. Why arguments about the size of smoked salmon slices or whether I mentioned my friend Dougal coming to see the flat?